Preface:
I wrote this essay for my CHF 1400 class this semester. In this paper I explain my love language, what it means, and how it will affect my relationship and future marriage.
My Love Language
Of the five love languages, Words of Affirmation are what affect me the most. All of the other four love languages are important to me as well in the order of Physical Touch, Acts of Service, Quality Time, and then Receiving Gifts. Learning about the love languages and finding out which one is my primary language has given me a new perspective on love and my relationship. These have also helped by knowing which one is my partner’s primary love language, so that I can speak it better and improve our relationship.
Since I have discovered that I am a Words of Affirmation person it has helped me understand things about myself that point to that love language. For example, I have always worried about what people might say to or about me, which is probably one reason why I have always been a rather quiet person. Criticism and name calling, especially from someone close to me, are especially hurtful. Also, not talking to me at all can make me feel unloved, such as the case with my dad. My dad and I never really talk to each other, and hardly ever have even though we lived in the same house until I was seventeen. That is most likely why he was a source of pain for me growing up.
If I take the time to picture the perfect relationship with the perfect partner, there would definitely be a lot of special words involved. I would like to hear a lot of complimenting, encouragement, and verbal expressions of my value as a person. If my partner were to make a habit of saying those kinds of things quite often, I feel like that would fill my love tank. One issue though is that if there are any instances of the negative things that drain my tank, I feel like it takes a lot more than normal to begin to fill it back up again. Therefore, there can be no harsh words even in the midst of many compliments, or the compliments will seem emptier.
I wrote this essay for my CHF 1400 class this semester. In this paper I explain my love language, what it means, and how it will affect my relationship and future marriage.
My Love Language
Of the five love languages, Words of Affirmation are what affect me the most. All of the other four love languages are important to me as well in the order of Physical Touch, Acts of Service, Quality Time, and then Receiving Gifts. Learning about the love languages and finding out which one is my primary language has given me a new perspective on love and my relationship. These have also helped by knowing which one is my partner’s primary love language, so that I can speak it better and improve our relationship.
Since I have discovered that I am a Words of Affirmation person it has helped me understand things about myself that point to that love language. For example, I have always worried about what people might say to or about me, which is probably one reason why I have always been a rather quiet person. Criticism and name calling, especially from someone close to me, are especially hurtful. Also, not talking to me at all can make me feel unloved, such as the case with my dad. My dad and I never really talk to each other, and hardly ever have even though we lived in the same house until I was seventeen. That is most likely why he was a source of pain for me growing up.
If I take the time to picture the perfect relationship with the perfect partner, there would definitely be a lot of special words involved. I would like to hear a lot of complimenting, encouragement, and verbal expressions of my value as a person. If my partner were to make a habit of saying those kinds of things quite often, I feel like that would fill my love tank. One issue though is that if there are any instances of the negative things that drain my tank, I feel like it takes a lot more than normal to begin to fill it back up again. Therefore, there can be no harsh words even in the midst of many compliments, or the compliments will seem emptier.